Hello December. Good-bye NaBloPoMo

Well, if you hadn't noticed, I failed at NaBloPoMo this year. I'm actually alright with it, though, since my goal this year wasn't to complete the month--I proved to myself that it could be done last year with a trip to Israel and illness included. My goal this year was to get back into the habit of writing and to decide where I wanted to head with the blog. Those goals I achieved.

Now, NaKniSweMo, though, was a total failure. I didn't really expect to be done, but I thought I'd be a lot closer than I am. I do have another week, though, since I switched patterns a week in. he girls are just not at the point where I can get that much knitting done in a day, though.

ICLW was fun and something I plan on joining again. Though it was often hard emotionally, I liked reading and discovering other blogs an then joining the conversation through commenting.

Now we are solidly in the homestretch of 2009 and my thoughts start turning to 2010. What fun adventures await us? What new challenges will we face? How should we challenge ourselves?

I Am Thankful For...

1. My family.
2. An electric blanket when I'm sleeping alone.
3. Hand knitted socks on a cold morning.
4. Children who pick up their playdough.
5. Having faith.

I hope everyone had a wonderful Thanksgiving (or Thursday if you aren't in the states)!

Week Four, Zone Four

Last week was I got a wonderful start, but ended up slowing down. I had gotten the bathrooms all done on Sunday and was debating whether to do the closets or craft area for the rest of the week. Well, on Monday we had a power outage from about 9:00 AM to 2:00 PM so I couldn't work in my closet. I got through the girls' closet super fast and then did my craft area. I was so inspired by the newly tidy area that I even did a quick layout after the girls were in bed.

When the power came back on I decided to start in my closet. Unfortunately there was a lot of dust on the top shelf and I ended up leaving when half done and spent the rest of the week dealing with the aftermath. It took two puffs of the inhaler to get me back up and running and then another puff that evening after taking out the trash. I pushed through and went to Disneyland on Tuesday which, while fun, was probably a mistake because I'm still running at around 85%. I've been taking it easy and am leery of doing what I want to do this week.

Even though this is the week to head to the bedroom I spent the morning tidying the areas I had cleaned earlier this month. It wasn't a huge mess, but little things like my knitting bag, the weekend's paper, one of the girls' games and a camera in the dining room. My apron, a cookie jar and slew of Barbies in the kitchen.

I finished up my closet and the master bedroom this afternoon.

I'm thinking of working in the living room (zone 5) for the rest of this week and then moving into the two spare rooms and the garage next week and into December. Then the house will be clutter-free for 2010.

Haveil Havalim #244 Is Up

over at A Mother in Israel. So go check it out! With ICLW under way I'm not sure how much reading I'll get done this week, but I always find interesting things.

Welcome!

Today is the second day of International Comment Leave Week (ICLW) and I had to join in when I heard about it! How could I not? I love adding more stuff to my day. LOL

A little background to the new visitors and a refresher course for my old friends.

I'm Miriam. After four years of trying (timed cycles, Clomid, injectibles and an IUI) I got pregnant with triplet girls. I had a wonderful pregnancy with only a couple days of bedrest when I had some spotting and then at 34 weeks, 5 days I went in for a regular check up and ended up delivering my girls via emergency c-section at 11:37, 38 and 39 pm.

I had some pretty bad post-partum depression and at seven months woke up from the haze and realized that I couldn't recall much of my girls' first half year.

I am currently happily in love with my crazy life, my dh (Aba), our 3-1/2 year old girls (Chaya, Shira and Batya) and our parrot (Zeus).

I knit, am learning crochet, scrapbook, sew, write, cook, bake, take photographs, play in the dirt and blog about all of that and more.

Overheard

Last night, walking home from dinner, I was pushing the stroller with all of the girls in it.

Chaya: When we get home can we watch a show?

Batya: No. Its still Shabbat!

Shira: I wish it was after havdalah and we could watch a movie with popcorn.

Me: But then tomorrow wouldn't be Shabbat and we wouldn't go to the Bet Knesset and see your friends and have lunch there.

Shira: Oh....I want tomorrow to be Shabbat.

Blatantly Blatant

It's odd that I'm writing this for today's post. Why is it so odd? Well, this Shabbat we have a Shabbaton so I don't have to do any cooking. On the agenda today is changing the beds, 1-2 loads of laundry, setting two timers, vacuuming the stairs, putting up the hot water urn and bathing the girls. It sounds like a lot all written out, but when you think of what I'm not doing (making challot, cooking, baking, salad prep, setting the table, etc.) it makes me wonder how I can even consider running out of time.

Shamelessly stolen from Hadassah at In the Pink.

Anything you want to know about me? Got some ideas for finishing up NaBloPoMo without resorting to tactics like this? C'mon and help a tired Ima out!

Judaism and Progressive Parenting

I recently joined Scott Noelle's PATH program and posted an introduction on the forums. I listed the basics...3-1/2 year old triplets, the path I took to attachment parenting, frum Jew. You know all that stuff that should help people see where I'm coming from. Turns out I'm the first triplet mom there, though there are a few twin moms and the only Orthodox Jew. Not too surprising, actually. What has left me stumped, though, is a question asked of me in one of the replies.

How do you integrate your parenting choices with your Orthodox values?

All of the jabbering on I do about both topics and I can't figure out a coherent answer to this! The best I can come up with is that it simply is. Sounds like a bit of a cop out, huh? Yet it seems the most accurate.

In the same way that I imagine a vegan mother would pass on her values towards the use of animal products to her children, I pass my values as a Torah Jew to my children.

Before we eat, we say the bracha. After the bathroom we say the bracha. We wash when we wake up and we say Sh'ma before bed. In our afternoon routine is prayer and at various points throughout the day we give tzedakah. When we shop for food, we have to look to see if it is kosher. When we shop for clothing we have to decide if it is appropriate. After eating a meat item we have to check the clock and wait before dairy.

In the same way that I'm not going to spank my children or send them on a time out or tell them that they are horrible people I'm not going to feed them a cheeseburger or let them watch a movie on Shabbat.

The largest obstacle to understanding how an Orthodox Jew can be a progressive parent lies in how you view your relationship with HaShem. A lot of people view HaShem as a benevolent father who has unending love for you when you are good but is harsh when you err. They also see the "rules" He has set before us as harsh and arbitrary and having no place in the modern world. By redefining the core relationship we have with HaShem we find that progressive parenting fits in very well with Orthodoxy.

Instead of viewing the mitzvot as unyielding rules set forth in an arbitrary manner I view them as immutable laws of truth--they simply are--and I interact with HaShem in a teacher-student relationship. As a teacher or mentor would, HaShem (through the Tanakh, Mishnah and the writings and drashim by Rabbanim throughout history) guides me through a life lived following the laws set forth in the Torah.

This is how I view my role as a parent. I'm not here to force my children to do anything. Rather I help them navigate a life that is true to them and fits within the framework of truth that we have. Just as I teach them that the law of gravity means they can't fly off of the top of a building I also teach them that the law of the Torah means we can't eat bread on Pesach.

I realize that this approach is a bit unorthodox, but since when has anything in my life been orthodox? Other than the whole Orthodox Jew thing, that is. :)

I highly recommend both the PATH program and Scott's free emails The Daily Groove. Both are wonderful to have in your parenting toolbox.

Carnival Thoughts (and a picture)

Today is the Mothering.com blog carnival and I'm at a loss as to what to write. I had wanted to present a beautiful, well-written essay that exemplifies some of Mothering's core values and the way it is reflected in my life.

But I'm not going to.

I was laid out Monday evening with a migraine. Tuesday I was almost better and went to Disneyland with the girls anyway. That evening the migraine started reviving and I'm sharing my Wednesday with a low-grade migraine that I'm combating with pretty much everything I have. Good week to have a Shabbaton and not need to prepare any Shabbat meals! Yay!

Now I'm back to where I started, though. What to write? As I thought about this more and more my left eye starts throbbing and I realize that this is what I'm writing.

I have long and often remarked that attachment parenting should be rebranded as responsive parenting. A parent needs to respond to the needs of the child and the family unit and work towards a common goal. That means Ima's needs also need to be responded to and met. Right now I need to relax and rest and not worry about a blog post.

So that's where I'm headed now. First, though, a gratuitous photo from yesterday...

Other Mothering.com Writing Women

http://codenamemama.com

http://greenvneck.blogspot.com/

http://www.moderatemeans.blogspot.com

http://www.oneplustwoislove.blogspot.com

http://paxye.com/blog/

http://moosaidthemama.blogspot.com/

http://simplyjess.wordpress.com/

Wordless Wednesday: Aquarium of the Pacific

Third Tuesday Cooking Carnival

Welcome to the first installment of The Third Tuesday Cooking Carnival! (If you have a better name, please share. My brain has stalled.) Sign up with Mister Linky below and visit the other participants' blogs to check out their recipes.

Recipe: Grandma Hanken's Sweet Potato Casserole

When I was growing up, the best part of any holiday meal was my grandmother's sweet potatoes. They weren't too sweet and sticky and there was always plenty so we had leftovers. It was one of those dishes that, no matter how many times she shared the recipe, never turned out the same. After she passed away my step-sister found a number of versions of this recipe in Grandma Hanken's recipe box. Who knows which one she cooked from.

Over time I experimented with different variations and my memory got fuzzier. I finally settled on this recipe which has been made kosher parve and fits into a traditional foods lifestyle. Should those things not matter to you, you can replace the melted coconut oil with vegetable oil or melted butter and the sucanat/rapadura with brown sugar.

The visual key of this recipe is the placement of the pecan halves. Rather than scattering them across the top, they are placed in neat little rows and patterns. I used to cover the top with a thick layer, but have decided that more spacing tastes better and isn't as heavy.

Ingredients

3 pounds sweet potatoes or yams

1 egg

4 tablespoons coconut oil, melted

1/4 cup orange juice

1 t. cinnamon

1 t. salt

1/2 t. pepper

a few gratings of nutmeg

1 t. vanilla

1/4 c. sucanat or rapdura

1/2 c. pecan halves

Cook potatoes using your preferred method. (If I have the oven on already, I'll roast them. If not I steam them.) Let cool slightly and mash. I like to leave some chunks. Mix in the rest of the ingredients except for sucanat and pecans. Spread into a greased baking dish. Sprinkle sucant on top and then top with pecan halves. Bake covered for 20 minutes and then uncovered for 20 minutes.

You can prepare them up to the baking and keep in the fridge or freeze. If frozen, defrost thoroughly before baking. You might need to bake covered a bit longer if it is really cool before going into the oven. Be careful not to burn the pecans, though, by keeping them uncovered too long.

You can find my other recipes here!

Week Three, Zone Three

I finished up the kitchen Sunday morning. Now let's see how long it will stay nice and tidy.

This week I'm moving into Zone 3 which is the bathrooms and "one extra area." Two of our bathrooms are rarely used so didn't need much other than restocking and refilling. The master bathroom, though, took some time. It didn't, however, take as long as I thought and I had it finished by 5:00 pm Sunday night.

Now I'm faced with the question of which "extra area" to tackle. Closets or craft area? The closets would be pretty quick since the girls' just needs a bit of tidying and a quick check for too small clothing. My closet needs a bit more, but not much. The craft area is pretty neat inside the cabinets but the counter needs help.

I'm going to try to get both of them done, but I'm going to start with the closet.

Wish me luck!

Haveil Havalim #243 Is Up

Phyllis at Ima on and Off the Bima is hosting this week. Go check it out. It usually takes me a week to get through all of the posts, but I'm hoping to get some time while Aba and the girls watch a movie to read. We'll see how that goes.

101/1001 Update

Today marks the one year countdown for completing my list. Pretty sad that I've forgotten about it for the most part. So now, what seemed like a reasonable list to complete over 1001 days is looking a little less reasonable over 365 days.

1. Go on a cruise
2. Save $5.00 a week for Israel fund (0/96)
3. Go skiing
4. Take a RV vacation across the US
5. Drive to Hearst Castle
6. Take a driving tour in Israel.
7. Go to Morocco
8. Shop in Morocco
9. Take the girls to Disney World
10. Dance with the girls at the Kotel
11. Live 1 month in Israel
    
12. Have another baby
13. Breastfeed a baby
14. Learn to use a wrap correctly. Done
15. Pay it forward once a month minimum (0/22)
16. Make a full batch of Challah and give away the extras.
17. Donate the girls’ old toys Ongoing
18. Donate the girls’ old diapers
19. Donate $1.00 a day to charity. (305/674)
20. Volunteer to deliver food for Tomchei Shabbat
21. Take a meal to a sick person Done.
22. Take a meal to a new mother Done
23. Donate $5.00 to charity for every item not completed.
24. Grow out hair to donate to Locks of Love FAIL I got sick of it and cut it off at about 5 inches. Chaya's hair is being grown out though.
25. Host a large Shabbat dinner
26. Make holiday binders (0/6)
27. Have my cupboards empty for Pesah (don't sell Chametz just have it gone)
28. Invite non-observant people for Pesah.
    
29. Join a women’s learning group
30. Write an essay about “Women and Orthodoxy” as counterpoint to the reform and conservative POV.
31. Invite non-observant people to 3 Shabbatot. (0/3)
32. See the dentist
33. Take my meds daily (290/674)
34. Take my vitamins daily (290/674)
35. Get bicycles for everyone in the family and go riding together.—will the girls be old enough? Maybe need a bicycle stroller? Must figure this one out.
36. Learn to belly dance
37. Look into eye surgery
38. Walk 10,000 steps every day for a week.
39. Get CPR certified
40. Get CPST certified
41. Buy myself a pair of good running shoes.
42. Try eating vegetarian for 1 week
43. Run a 5K
44. Submit 5 projects for publication
45. Make something from homespun yarn
46. Edit family pictures that are online Done
47. Back-up family pictures
48. Go to SnB regularly Score!
49. Go to a scrapbooking crop regularly Having trouble finding one. Scrapbooking isn't as big as it used to be.
50. Refinish a table
51. Sew curtains
52. Learn to crochet.
53. Re-evaluate items on my Ravelry queue monthly. (10/22)
54. Re-evaluate my 101/1001 list monthly (1/22)
55. Have enough knitted dishcloths to not use sponges (16/50)
56. Learn to make soap.
    
57. Get up-to-date on printing pictures. Check. I only print pictures as I want them now.
58. Knit a sweater for everyone in the family. (3/5) Working on mine now. Aba says he doesn't want a sweater so he will get a vest.
59. Give only handmade gifts for 1 year.
60. Finish decorating my bedroom. Almost there!)
61. Make the house shoe-free
62. Grow tomato plant
63. Grow herb garden
64. Return phone calls as they come in.
65. Get a bill paying system set up and use it.
66. Return Netflix as soon as I watch them or realize I don’t really want to watch them.
67. Make an extra payment each month on the van. (3/22)
68. Make a budget done
69. Live within my budget
    
70. Make my menus for 1 week.
71. Grocery shop from my menus
72. Cook from my menus
73. Update emergency preparedness kits
74. Make emergency preparedness kits for cars
75. Do OAM cooking one month
    
76. Complete making my 101/1001 list. (All done!)
77. Get Zeus to come to my hand.
78. Call a radio talk show I emailed one and it was read on the air. Called one but someone got on with my comment first.
79. Take a wine tasting class
80. Convince someone else to do the 101 in 1001 project with me.
81. Be an extra
82. If I don’t read email groups weekly, unsubscribe Done
83. Respond to one email a week in each of my email groups Getting better at this.
84. Use canvas bags when shopping Doing well!
85. Get professional portrait taken
86. Get a mani/pedi monthly (0/22)
87. Go out for family day once a month. (0/22)
88. See a play
89. Write a letter of appreciation to 5 artists (any media) whose work has touched me.
90. Write a letter to the editor.
91. Find some “me space” in the house. Got my craft area and my little corner of the sofa.
92. Photo document 100 things that make me happy (0/100)
93. Get rid of the grubby clothing from my closet Did this once and I have been getting rid of stained stuff as I realize stains aren't coming out.
94. Be car-free for 1 week
95. Be TV free for 1 week
96. Be caffeine-free for 1 week Done, but I've been back on the caffeine for a while.
97. Be take-out-free for 1 week.
98. Work on a political campaign
99. Send a postcard to PostSecret
100. Get rid of 1001 clutter items (519/674)
101. Get fully dressed daily Been doing and I feel great!

Did You know There Are Only 29 Days Until Hanukkah?

From Home-shuler! by way of Phyllis.

A Jewish Holiday Meme

One menorah, or several? Hillel or Shammai? (just kidding about that part)
We use one large one in the front window.

Do you buy your children gifts for every night of Chanukah?
The girls get one large store-bought combined gift from us and 2 handmade ones each.

Do you and your spouse/partner or any other adults in your life exchange gifts?
No. Our anniversary is in the end of January so we exchange then.

Special family chanukah traditions?
We have eight books that I wrap. Each night we open one as a family and read it together. Aba and I have also discussed "adopting" a family and providing Hanukkah for them. We haven't decided if that will fit into the plans this year. I have hopes of making this a time of giving to others as well as getting gifts.

Latkes or sufganiyot? If latkes, sour cream or applesauce?
Sufganiyot mostly. I've made latkes but that usually happens on day 7 or 8 when we are feeling maxed out on the sufganiyot. When we have latkes it is applesauce. All. The. Way.

Favorite chanukah book?
Light the Candles by Joan Holub was popular last year.

Do you actually play dreidl? If so, what do you use for counters?
We just spin and spin and spin them for the girls.

What relationship, if any, do you have with Christmas and all things Christmas-y?
None.

If you're reading, you're tagged!

Thursday Thirteen

aka I don't have a good post ready so I'm joining this meme.

Here are 13 things I know I should do because I feel so much better and life runs more smoothly, but I don't.

1. Eat low carb.

2. Eat gluten-free or at least low gluten.

3. Drink water. A lot of water.

4. Walk.

5. Use an electric toothbrush.

6. Take my vitamins.

7. Use my neti pot.

8. Really stretch after I work out; not that half-hearted lame thing I call stretching.

9. Go to sleep early.

10. Wake up early.

11. Eat raw veggies.

12. Stick to my menus.

13. Go to Disneyland.

Now go make your own list and sign up on Thursday-13.com!

Toddler Sleep and the Blessings of Routine

I know I've talked a bit about the girls' sleep before but it seems that the sleepy subject keeps popping and I just can't resist joining the fray. A few caveats first:

1. The girls have almost always co-bedded since they were allowed out of their isolettes in the NICU. The only times they've slept apart has been when they have chosen to. That usually lasted a week or two.

2. The girls have been in our bedroom since coming home from the hospital.

3. We have always welcomed the girls into the family bed, though they have also had cribs and beds of their own. They go to sleep in their bed(s) and if they wake up they usually come to the family bed.

4. We have never left our children to cry. We have never sleep-trained them. The only time we have refused them a night bottle was after returning from Israel. Before travelling they had not been night-waking and after getting them back to the correct time we cuddled and rocked the few times they woke for a bottle.

On to the fun stuff. When dinner time rolls around we start including, "...then we'll put on pjs, brush our teeth, pick out books and go lishon," to just about every sentence. At first this was very important because they all need help transitioning (Batya especially!) but now as soon as it gets dusk they will help close the curtains, fix Zeus for bed, pick out books and talk about bed. They will even correct you if you forget to mention a step in their routine. At 6:00 pm we formally start our routine.

First the girls pick up their toys. This can take a while. The best strategy I've come up with for this is giving them a set time for book reading to end. If they dawdle through the routine then they can only fit in one or two books. If they do it quickly then they can pick three books each for reading. Most of the time we can fit in four to six books.

After we've picked up and picked out books we head upstairs. The girls brush their teeth and wash their faces. If anyone has knots, I'll run a brush through their hair, to. Then we get into jammies and pull-ups and climb into bed. Usually I have to run downstairs once or twice to get something we forgot. (Red blanket for Chaya, green for Batya and Shira needs Towely.) It seems something always gets forgotten. The girls curl in bed with their sippy of milk and I read and then they go to sleep. They are usually asleep around 6:45 pm.

Yes, I know the milk should be before the teeth brushing, but the girls have such a strong sleep association with the milk that they meltdown and then bedtime gets stressful and messed up. I keep experimenting with solutions, but nothing is working. Anyone have ideas?

Week Two, Zone Two

Week one went well. Check out my nice, newly organized art closet. I found some stuff I had forgotten I had and discovered that I only have two glue sticks left.

This week I head to the kitchen. The kitchen is a hub in our home and stuff seems to accumulate everywhere in there. Egg cartons and a bucket of change for tzedakah on top of the fridge, office stuff on the freezer, miscellaneous stuff on the table, appliances, dishes and junk on the counters.

Decluttering will be hard because I love my kitchen gadgets and I can find a use for all of the serving pieces. It is going to take some serious soul searching to decide which pieces will be leaving us. I am considering taking some of the serving pieces, kashering them and then packing them away for Pesah. That does seem a little bit like putting it off until later, though.

I cannot believe I'm posting these pictures of my kitchen on the internet for all to see.

This Winter I Will

* play in the mud

* roast marshmallows in the fireplace

* splash in puddles

* make a mess with paint

*make sourdough bread

*plan a garden

This winter I will spend time at my girls' level and revel in the wonder of their discoveries. I will say "yes" more and erase "no" from my vocabulary.

This winter I will enjoy the season for what it is and share in its delights with my family.

This winter I will be open about my wants and needs, wishes and dreams, fears and uncertainties with the man I love.

This winter I will be me.